Whats up with that?! [Article from a Mag!]

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People who when asked for their opinions go 'nice' or 'different', preceded by a palpable pause. For e.g. "Oh its..(palpable pause)..nice." Should I go ahead and assume that you mean the opposite already? I've started carrying a 'nice' big bat i can take to their heads!

What about guys who're overly chivalrous and brimming with human kindness? They are pulling out chairs saying "ladies first" more times than should be legal and asking to carry your handbags!
FYI: I'm a girl - it's not a debilitating disease, okay?

People who must necessarily shorten even the shortest of the words. I mean either you are unbelievably crazy or excruciatingly cool. I get it in a text message but in normal written english? When 'have' becomes 'hav' and 'friends' becomes 'frndz'. Here's a shortened term for you- WTF!

The urge to team every damn outfit with leggings. There was a time before you know- where dresses were content to be just dresses ans skirts weren't afraid to be just themselves!
So spurn the leggings, say yes to separates!!

Have you noticed those lit traffic signs? Dont they say the darnedest things? Stuff like "Ravaan had ten, you have only one. Wear a helmet!", or "You drink, you drive, we die!". I'm sorry! Are you trying to prevent accidents or cause them? Because driving while you are having a snickering seizure is not safe!

And the variety that goes "maybe, maybe not!" when you ask them just about anything!..
"Are you an ass?" "Maybe, maybe not!". Ofcourse its maybe or maybe not- there are only 2 options you indecisive cow! I need to lie down or I'm going to have an aneurysm.

People for whom missed calls is a way of life. You people put the 'heapskate' in 'cheapskate'. And please stop calling them 'cut calls' or I will have to end you.

Duh, get a life.