Title?

Yes,
I laugh a lot, even when it's not required.
I cry when I feel extremely happy.
I show that I don't care, but I do.
I pretend to be strong and dis-passioned, even when I'm extremely passionate but weak.
I talk a lot, when I'm nervous.
I goof up things and end up making a fool out of myself.
I try to go anti-love and end up falling in love, again.
I suck at expressing my feelings.
I love dancing in the rains and jumping in puddles, even though I behave in a sophisticated most of the times.
I realize the fact that people take advantage of me, but I don't do anything about it.
I know how it feels to be taken for granted, but somehow I end up at the same place again.
My self confidence doesn't take a minute to degrade, but I won't show.
I say I expect nothing, and people tend to believe that lie.
I behave unhurt even when I want people to realize their mistakes and apologize.
I behave all sorted, even when I'm messed up.

Not because I want to pretend, but because I love living in my own shell..

And, I love being random.

Love at first sight.

So it all started with a plan.
A plan to meet.
A plan to meet, spend some quality time together and watch a movie.
And as time went by..

We saw..
An old man..
and then the focus turned..
TO HIM.
AND THAT IS WHEN I FIRST SAW HIM.
Riding a bicycle with a captivating smile..
My heart melted.
His hair shined under the sunshine and I could have drowned in his eyes!ten million times!
He looked up and smiled..
And felt the breeze against his face.
Moments later, he parked his bicycle and entered school..



...Harvard Medical School.



Jim Sturgess, I love you.
And it's love at first sight! :')

 Love. <3

It's your day, mom! :)

Here's to us mum! :D
To the ten thousand pet names you invented, to see my over-react to them every single time.
How you forced me to drink bournvita every morning and got me addicted to it.
For how you said "We need to talk?" every time I yelled.
For being psychic enough to understand the mood I was in.
For staring at my clothes and saying "Ye kya pehen liya :O" every time the combination looks disgusting,
For teasing me with random guys and saying "Oh. Your best friend" every time I spoke about some girl I hated.
For discussing about my childhood with Salonee and talking about the embarrassing things I did.
The way you say "Your birthday is mother's day for me." and stare at me when I say "awww".
For understanding my needs and fulfilling my demands.
For reading my mind and making life easier.
For bribing me with chocolate ice-cream after cancelling plans on me.
For saying "Pasand agaya?" every time I stared at a cute guy in the mall.
For the little secrets we share, and the crack inside jokes in front of dad.
The way we discuss about the people from our peer groups.
For being my permanent best friend.
For making me the kind of girl I am, today.
For imitating me when I'm irritated.
For calling me malnutritioned.
For boosting my confidence and controlling my ego.
And for many other things that have not been mentioned here.

I love you, mom.
And I always will.
Happy Mother's Day ♥ 

You are my superstar! ☆ 

Decode it by selecting :P

"Everyone, at some point in their lives, wakes up in the middle of the night with the feeling that they are all alone in the world, and that nobody loves them now and that nobody will ever love them, and that they will never have a decent night’s sleep again and will spend their lives wandering blearily around a loveless landscape, hoping desperately that their circumstances will improve, but suspecting, in their heart of hearts, that they will remain unloved forever. The best thing to do in these circumstances is to wake somebody else up, so that they can feel this way, too.” -Lemony Snicket

Just noticing.

It's about how we sail through every hard situation.
And then when another hard situation arises, we gather hope from the previous one.

The way we feel weak and strong both, while choosing between the right and the desired.

How we always keep cribbing about something we're not and ignore something that we are.

The way every person gives us at least one reason to be jealous of him/her.

How we always find someone whose more optimistic than we are, and someone whose life is worse than ours.

How the short one's die to get tall and how the tall one's wish that they weren't as tall as they are.

How people express their boredom in creative ways.
And then they get bored of getting bored.
And then bored of being bored of getting bored (& it goes on and on an on!)

Everyone has the ONE best friend in their life, who will be supportive through the right and the wrong.

People change with time and experiences. Some decisions make one stronger, while some soften the person.

The songs that I can relate to my life. I feel like the song had been written by extracting inspiration from my story.

How everyone has a different story to tell, a different promise to make..

How all the teens undergo the very same problems and still believe that theirs is of the highest magnitude.

How the funniest songs become the most  famous ones! (Baby, Friday etc..:P)

How movies inspire the way we look at life and give us hope.

The pictures we all click to capture the memories, the sentimental talks we have, the songs we relate, the secrets we share, the love that binds all of us, how we feel special on our birthdays..

Everyone has one trait that others go "Are-you-mad?" about :P
(Mine- i HATE surprises. Be it parties, gifts or visits.)

They way the definition of friendship changes from one person to another.

How one emoticon can express your mood.

The way people have irreplaceable people and relations : )

Was just noticing. :)

Untitled.

After a point of time, you cannot be there for everyone. You need some time by yourself. You get tired of being the one at whom people throw mood-swings. Everything goes wrong. You just need mental peace, if not happiness.
After a point of time you feel like you just need to abscond to some place and get rid of everyone, everything.
You don't care about your present, future. It's just like the whole world is falling apart!
This feeling sucks, totally.

Hmm.

I made that on MS Paint because I was bored.
:|
Boredom makes me do unusual things.
:S

I know I can hangout with friends etc. but I cannot do that ALL the time, can I?
Or maybe I can.

But for now,
I AM BORED!


PS. I miss school!

Glory redefined!

We've seen history repeat itself!
We've seen a billion prayers getting answered..
We've experiences crucial heartbeats and tense moments while watching a game which is BEYOND religion..
We've seen faith show it's magic..

WE'VE SEEN OUR NATION- INDIA, WIN!!
CWC 2011 IS OUR'S BITCHES! :)

Hats off- Virat Kohli <3 Tenduu <3 YUVIII <3 GAUTAM!<3 and
HAIL OUR CAPTAIN MSD..and in fact ALL the players..for playing AS A TEAM!! :)

*sentimental moment!*
Live it everyone!! LIVE IT!

It's how every fan keeps following his player, keeps the faith intact and makes the Indian team confident during crucial moments!
It's just how our nation and it's population is! :)
Cricket craze, honey!

So today,
I saw a match on a big screen!
It was a blue day.
Everyone wore blue, painted faces, girls applied blue nail polish and all that!
And in the end the whole audience erupted with an applause!
People yelled, screamed, cried, aww-ed- Everyone had a different reaction, but every face expressed one emotion- PROUD TO BE AN INDIAN! :)

So here's to India, the Indian Cricket Team and it's glory- CHEERS! :)

PS. There's a lot more I would want to add to this.
But for now, I'm feeling too hyper and sensitive about the whole win!

PPS. I will write another continuation post for this one, soon. And I haven't uploaded the pictures I've clicked and google hasn't been updated about the win. So putting up a simple picture.

To the man of the match Dhoni and the man of the series, Yuvi.

This picture needs no description. He's the God of cricket.

To Kohli and Gautam!

AND TO TEAM INDIA :)

Xoxo!

Abhi toh poori raat baki hai! =)

Exams! ^_^
The very first thing I hate about exams is their timing. I am forced to wake up early in the morning =(
But exams are good fun! =D
They keep you awake till 4 o clock in the night (not morning because it isn't morning for me till I wake up!=P) because you haven't studied a thing throughout the term.
You gulp in loads of coffee to keep yourself awake.
You make notes which you'll probably never read again!
You study for the heck of it.(to sail through the exam)
Exams ain't that bad.
You have friends messaging and calling you up all the time and asking if you're done with the syllabus.
And when you get a response that matches your situation, you feel relaxed. =D
("Of course I'm not done! I'm leaving half of them!")
It's about feeling relaxed during the day and panicking at night and cursing yourself for spending four hours on Facebook in spite of knowing that you had loads to cover.
How you suddenly feel nocturnal.
You curse yourself for bunking relentlessly, prioritizing everything else over the two chapters you are not able to get through, you can see flashbacks where you were having fun and neglecting your studies, etc.
But then,
Studying during the night before the exam and completing the syllabus is the most wonderful feeling EVER 
because you complete something in ten hours that others took months to complete! =D


And then when your paper hits off well, YOU FEEL LIKE A FRIGGING GENIUS! (and hence you decide to continue following the 'last-moment-studies-pattern')

(Not to mention that Etc. occurs in almost every answer and every example. I got some weird text saying 'Etc. = End Of Thinking Capacity'. Lol. =P)

PS. I wasted Saturday and Sunday doing time pass. And now I have Hindi tomorrow. 

I know I'll finish studying, because Salonee says  - अभी तोह पूरी रात  बाकी है!


PPS. It's fun writing Hindi words in English. ^_^ Kya baat! kya baat! =P 

Is it okay?

Is it okay to blog when..
I'm mind fucked?
I'm undergoing mood swings?
I am jealous?
I could kill someone?
I cry?
I laugh like a sadist?
Life seems befuddled?
I feel cranky?
I laugh at myself?
I feel like a loser?
I feel like a loner?
I blame someone else?


Is it okay to blog even if I think that I suck at blogging?

Blog like no one's gonna read it?
Throw up all your feelings out here?

There's one amazing thing about blogging though.
If you maintain an anonymous profile and pour out all your feelings..You feel satisfied that someone you don't even know of, is going to read it and either relate it to his/her own life or not give a fuck about it.
And THAT has to be okay. :)

It happens with everyone else too! ^_^

I am not the only one whose been betrayed by a friend. Even others have been.
I am not only one to suffer from heartbreak. Even others have to.
I cry, get moody, fight, feel lonely, suffer helplessly, cry before getting injected (faint after it!), give 100 reasons for not taking a medicine, secretly envy smarter people, bunk oral exams, behave like an egoistic bitch, refuse to apologize, feel like a sucker when it comes to blogging, feel like I cannot make friends, get wicked, throw my moodswings at my best friends, write silly rhymes, find idiotic ways to overcome boredom, read the same word so many times that it finally looks meaningless, feel alienated at times, crave for eating Maggi at dinner time, fail to understand a few jokes, get out-witted...but at one point of time even others have undergone/ will undergo all of this!
Every person has problems. I am not the only one.
At one point in life, every person realizes the importance of being strong and independent. Even I will!

It's not like I'm happy that others have problems.
It's just that seeing them get through those gives me hope and satisfaction.
I know that I am not the only one suffering and of course I do not own all the problems in the  world!

So whatever happens with me in life..
At a point of time...
Happens with everyone else too! ^___^

And it all began with boredom.

11 am in the morning while travelling to college.
I was in a train, while Ria was in a bus!
[via texts]

Me: I is too bored. :P

Ria:
I is too bored too :/
but what to do..
cannot be fun sitting beside,
a man in a skunk's hide.
NO offense to that guy,
my rudeness is a bit too high..
I guess at this lousy time..
My only source of fun is to rhyme.

Me:
So now let me tell you that your rhyme was a waste..
You are going to continue to undergo a helluva of haste..
The man's gonna formidably continue to stink..
So please change your seat before your nostrils shrink!
Wink wink! ^_^

Ria:
Wink at him my ass!
My rhymes-dont you sass!
They always make me feel better..
They are no way going down the gutter!
Oh the smell is killing me..
When I come there you will see..
How relieved it is to be out of this fated monstro-sity,
and be finally ekdam free!
:P

Me:
Ohmygod I tell you.I really know how you feel..
This lady sitting next to me..
Has applied oil that makes her stink!

What is she doing in my compartment?
Who gave her a first class pass? :O
If she doesn't get up fast..
My breath isn't gonna last!

Ria:
I'm telling you our fate sucks..
We are both sitting besides these lousy shmucks..
Don't die oh friend of mine..
Don't worry you'll be fine..
Breathe through your mouth and concentrate on your rhyme..
You never know how fast it'll pass the time!
Brace yourself get ready for more..
Atleast she's not a whore! :P

Me:
Thank god she isn't a whore that shines..
Of sweat and sex throughout the night.
Oh how crucial moments can get..
Rise in intimacy, heat and breath! :P

Shit I rhymed pervert stuff!
But i swear this isn't a bluff..
Iki's gonna find understanding this tough..
What's up with us not attending lectures and stuff? :O

Ria:
Lol yeah you did..
Of that man I finally got rid..
Now get out of that bleeding train..
Or from slapping you I won't refrain!
-----------------------------------

And it ended there because we finally met at the college gate :P

Life. Random thoughts. Rantings.

LIFE.That's the word that no one can ever describe in an accurate manner.
It's just there!
Tragic, comedy, hectic, depressing, fun, miraculous, placid, happening, amazing, awesome, pathetic, horrible, horrendous etc.
(Varies from person to person, from mood to mood and from situation to situation.)
Every day, while I am doing nothing I get random thoughts.
(Ranging from philosophical statements to making plans of killing someone brutally.)

There are times when I hate everyone in the world.
Every person seems like a huge burden to me, to man-kind.
Everyone selfishly seems to be involved in their own problems. Expecting you to be there, but not being there for you.
Sounds so "Waav".
:/

There are times when I just feel amazing for a being a person who tries to BE THERE for everyone.
No really. That feeling of trying also gives me content.

There are times when I listen to 'I'll be there for you' over and over again and go nostalgic like a mad cow.
No trust me, it really does give me happiness.
I love those 'flashbacks' I get.
They're one of the bestest things in the world!
:)

I have this thing for dramatical responses.
They infuse some kind of an enthusiasm in me!
(^ Bare my randomness.)

I have a tendency to get sentimental over every single thing.
From being someone's bestfriend, to being hated by a person, on being a daughter, on being a Ruiaite to being an ex-tps-ite!
I'm just overflowing with sentiments!
And my friends.
OH MY FRIENDS.
They never get tired of saying 'kitna senti hoti hai bey!' or 'nautanki sali!' or 'Ishi, you deserve the Oscar! No you really do.'

Oh, and there are these chicks in my college who are high on Engl..

Ok. Chuck that.
I don't know what to write further.
So I'm going to end this post on an abrupt note!

Sayo Nara!
:/

Psyched up!

I love my 'oh-so-hectic life!'
:D

What gives me happiness these days is college.
Cultural preparations.
Hangouts.
New friends.
I now think that the definition of happiness certainly changes with time.
And it should.
Happiness is certainly something which comes by choice.
If you choose to be happy, you will be.
:)

God, I feel so thoughtful at times.
^_^

Crossing- roads and fun levels.

Well!
Life is back on track!

I feel amazing when college keeps me busy.
Cultural stuff is awesome.

December is such an eventful month.

It started with Kshitij '10 and then Mood-I is coming up! And then well of course, so is my college fest!

You get the most amazing feeling when you walk down the street with your friends, late at night laughing on the most retarded things ever. And oh yes, singing songs like maniacs. :P

Just one of the small things that make me happy!

And oh yes,
I was finally successful in crossing the highway ON MY OWN.
Yes, I'm kinda one of those who don't know how to cross!
OK, wait. WAS.
:D
Achievement! :D *drum roll*

And yes, such silly things do make me feel happy.:S

Just one of those sentimental mood swings.

Friends!
Who are they?
The one who make you believe that the world is not as bad as it seems.
They are the one's who can not only manage to make you smile but also make sure that you break into fits of laughter, even when you are not in a mood to smile.
They make you want to live. They are the one's who fathom that you are the best, no matter what.
They are simply the cause of your survival.

Be it a heartbreak, an emergency, mood swings, rough days or whatever-Friends are always there- TO THE RESCUE!

*I feel so sentimental right now*

All the letters and cards, policies and rules, sleepovers, hangovers, hangouts.
Everything.
Little things that give happiness.
I love you guys.
All my friends :)
For being there.
Making my life Awesome.
Giving me an identity.
And - For accepting me the way I am. :)
For what I am. :D

And for making me feel special and giving me a reason to exist.

I love you all. :)

*BIGGGG HUGGG!*

About feeling helpless.

It when a have a really close friend.
its when you want that friend to have ALL the happiness he deserves.
But you CANNOT help it, but read what he feels.

Its a post from his blog.

Read on:

....A moment in past when i was all wrong.
Sometimes we just neglect the consequences.
Sometimes we are ready to sacrifice evrything.
Sometimes we walk that extra mile.
Sometimes we do things that we know wunt give us happiness in future.
Sometimes we repeat the same mistakes again and again.
Evrytime we repeat it gets uglier.
We Just Live that moment. That's the moment when after few days or months or years..we realize that We Were ALL WRONG.

But somewhere we love to do such mistakes.
Somewhere we love to have broken hearts.
Those tears. those lonely times.
But ugly is d Truth.
The truth we tend to ignore.
The truth we wished was just a nightmare.


Its the change of state.
The Rock we were holding tightly suddenly becomes the sand we can neva hold tightly.
IT all changes. It all slips away. Right beneath our eyes. Right from our hands.

That very moment we curse that one moment from the past when we were right yet we were wrong.

That is the moment that makes us a breeding ground of all the potential guilts.
Guilt that just kills you inside out.
That moment when u dont sit to write down all this.
that moment u just need a shoulder.
that moment is d one when u just dont wanna live.
but u stilll survive..for a better tmrw.
running away from those dark hurting secrets....hiding ur emotions.
When you just wanna scream that its the not what you had asked for.
Yet no answer to ur questions.
That moment when u cry , u r not weak. u r not cryng on urself.
You cry coz a moment in past you were all right yet it all went wrong and It seemed to b the worstest moment of your life.



Ma moment in past when i was all wrong was when i thought i will neva have to come to this page to edit it.
But as they say....it all comes down to where you started.
the world keeps spinning. today i rectify the mistake by coming here.
Coz running away is not the solution.
Coz der is nuthing better than to accept truth sumtimes
The Truth that hurts is the truth that heals. The moment in past that was right is all wrong now.



-----


---------------------x----------------------------

Break ups can fuck the shit outta teens.

So here's a message for my friend-

Dont pretend.
Let it out.
Dont worry of what the world will think.
Cry it out.
Pretending aint gonna help.
Share, cry.
Once the crying is over, you will be happy.
And that happiness is going to be REAL.

Friendship.

This post is dedicated to two special friends.
Very special friends.
:)
They might not live in the town i live in.
They might not even get to see me for ages.
But they have helped me.
Been by my side through thick and thin.
They know when I cry and know when I laugh.
They know how to perfectly make me smile.
They pass on hope.

I love them.

We have had times of togetherness even when we weren't together.
We cried when our hearts broke, fought when we felt agitated.
Laughed when something special came along.
We are not even close to being perfect. We might not be the COOL types, but we share the love and relationship people can only dream of. {long distance ;)..]

If one undergoes a heartbreak, the other two experience the pain.
[As filmy as it sounds, but it does happen!]


So this one's for you girls [Swati and Akshita]-
I love you both!
And don't you guys ever leave me!

Friends Forever :)
<3
X

And that's where I belong.

I am about to enter a NEW world.
A totally new one.
Its not the same anymore.
I don't know where life will take me.
Is this where I belong?
I don't know.
:)

But I wish I do.

At times I wonder- Will my idea of HAVING FUN remain the same forever?

I miss old times.
Not long ago did I want my hectic life to come to an end.
I wanted my hectic schedule to end so that I could not have restrictions and rules.
I would no more have to wake up at 6 in the morning and asking mom to give me five more minutes to complete my slumber.
I would no more have to wear the uniform (which was kinda cute) and find reasons to not drink bournvita right in the morning.
My tie would no more be hanging in my neck untied and i would no more be running with my sandwich in my hand and gulping it inside the life.
The though of not doing all that anymore used to excite me.
But now I think- Is that what i REALLY wanted?
Well i don't think so. :S

Back in time- I was totally busy. I did not have time for myself. And now i think that it was the life i wish i would have FOREVER. <3 That way my mood swings were in control. I did not have the time to think about how lonely I was or how unwanted few people made me feel. I never had to think about how fascinated people were about their relationships (Well i thought that it was complete SHITE to do pda and flaunt about your boyfriends all the time in front of people who wouldn't give a shite.)
All that brought happiness in my life was the fun i had in class.
The way people supported me over others! [*flaunt*]
The way I used to play pranks on anyone and everyone.
The way I used to roam around in my throw ball jersey.
The way i used to bunk classes.
The way i used to get irritated every time a girl told me how casual i behaved with the guys.

I loved the way people yelled petnames (mine!) in the corridoors loudly.
I behaved like a total drama queen then, but then I knew it was their way of expressing their love. :)
I miss that too.

In fact,

I never thought I would actually miss all this.

Now,
Who would complete my lab manuals?
&&
Who would tell me reasons for not doing my homework?

Who would care if I did not attend my classes for a day?

I don't know how the new place [college] will be.
But talking about school- Well, that's the place I will ALWAYS belong to.
<3


*Nostalgia*

Why bid adieu>?

[I got emo in class..that its da last year of school life..and ended up writing this poem...read it! :)]...


--------

All the thirteen years , have passed in a second..
My school lifes gonna end..the very next moment!
I wanna relive those moments..those most wonderful times..
Life was so lovely...I culd freely jump and dance!

Why does this happiness have 2 cum 2 an end?
Why cant my sorrows..wait back for a mom-ent!
I so luv the corridor where we used to roam..
Me and my frndz..were the coolest people known!

Now when its ending..i realise its worth
No more longbreaks..and no more classroom flirts!
Roaming and bunking..gossiping and jumping!
I swear my whole school life..was rockingly lovely!

Some juniors, some seniors
Some sharing, some caring..
Some crushes, some heartbreaks!
Some late midnight texting!

Those cute football players..
Those tall bball hotties!
Those shawwties in jersies..
Those dear ones playing rugby!!

I love all of them..
Big deal that they crazy!
They made my life worth living..
Im leaving with extravagant memories! :)

Cheers,
Desdemona!